Supportive Partners

April 15, 2019

To the girl who is struggling to feel worthy. I’ve been you. To the woman who feels worthless when her husband speaks to her. I’ve been you. To the woman who loves singing to every song that comes on the radio because it feels you with SUCH joy. I am you! But I also know what’s it’s like to have an unsupportive partner. Where when the song comes on and you just want to sing, but they make you feel lower than dirt and tell you to stop singing. And when they do it’s like it crushes your soul a little bit. You love singing. They don’t like it. So shame on you for singing in the car. Shame on you for being silly. Shame on you for being out going. Shame on you for wanting to have friends. Shame on you for wanting to get a baby sitter and have a date night. Shame on you for wanting some time away to hang out with girl friends. Or go dancing. Shame on you.

 

FUCK that. Pardon my language. But F**K THAT. You were born to be exactly who YOU ARE. Not who someone else wants you to be. Girl, I have lived through the pain of not being enough for someone. For being shamed for me. I have lived it most of my life. Too loud. Too annoying. Heck, I was being bullied in middle school and being called a whore when I hadn’t even had sex with anyone. But that doesn’t stop a manipulative ex boyfriend. So instead of doing what I did, and hearing those harsh words and becoming what they want, rise above. Know who you are, who you really are, and always listen to that voice.

 

This world is CRUEL. Unfortunately, most of the world wants to tear you down, and keep you from crawling out into your awesomeness. Why? Because they want you to stay small. If you have power, and start to realize how amazing you truly are, all those negative, unsupportive people lose their power over you.

Well, I’m here to tell you. We have one life on this planet. ONE. How will you spend it? Are you currently in a relationship that makes you sick to your stomach? Evaluate it. What are the real issues? Can they be peacefully resolved? If so, do you want to save it? If no to both, then get the hell out as fast as you can and don’t look back. How do I know? I spent a lot of my life in relationships I didn’t want to be in because I was never shown what a healthy relationship looked like. I craved love everywhere, and even if you treated me like garbage, well you loved me. Right? Wrong! You are a QUEEN. And if anyone making you feel like you aren’t worth it. Then the relationship isn’t worth it. This could be friendships, work environments, relationships, sometimes even family members. Severing this relationship is never easy, but neither is living a life miserable wishing you could escape from it.

I want you to take out a pen and paper, a journal if you have one. Every day, I want you to sit and write what truly makes you happy. Not what makes others in your life happy. What makes you happy? The real you. When you first go to write this, you may not know. U know it look me a while to figure out what it was that made me happy. But the more consistent you are in the routine, the more you’ll see what lights a fire within you. Not only do I want you to write down what makes you happy. Then write the things you wish to change in your life. This could be ANYTHING. Maybe one thing tugging at your heart is to start a blog, or to change jobs, Maybe, it is to leave that unsupportive partner. I am telling you, work your way towards those goals.

If you partner always finds something to be unhappy or unsupportive about, maybe it is time you work on taking care of you girl. Because you are beautiful, you are strong, and trust me, you damn well can move mountains. Find those who support you, encourage you, and love you, because you will always have those who don’y approve of what you’re doing, and then have those who support you fully.

 

I have been on both ends, in between, and I totally understand the pain associated when you are just so excited about something, and you want to share that excitement with the one you love most, only to be met with disapproving looks, and negativity. Almost like a punch in the gut. My world changed though when I began to focus on me, my goals, and my dreams. When you really know what you want, and you’re on a mission to get there, you realize unsupportive partners, or people in generally, do not have a place in your life. Now, I am not talking about the occasional disagreement. There WILL be times you do not agree, but when everything is met with a negative front, maybe it is time to re-evaluate.

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